The Laws of Marriage
Is arrange marriage equally wonderful as love marriage?
I have been wondering about the concept of arrange marriage. How is it working from centuries even when there is no connection between the individuals? Or is it love at first sight?
Indians run around searching for their soulmate. Biodata and photos are passed to all potential families. Families meet, and let the boy and girl talk and find if they are meant for each other or in many areas that too is not considered proper. Sometimes it is difficult to find in one meeting, so a series of meetings take place. Its really hard to find out if they have any connection no matter how many meeting they attend.Or am I being too mean.
But the numbers show that arrange marriages are far better than love ones. How is that possible? Is it that the patner loses interest and therefore doesnt want to complain? Is it the pressure from the families that let them unite or in other words dont let them seperate?
Or is it that in love marriages partner excise there free will and their egos are at stake, therefore they seperate? Or is it that the patner loses respect for the other?
Writers, bloggers, enviromentalist may have writen thousands of lines on this topic but none has ever been able to find the secret, then, how can I? Let this remain a secret and let the time come when I post the real situation.
Can you take a chance to crack this secret?
You’re planning to get married na. So just wait. Right now enjoy and don’t let these silly stuff venture inside :p
Arranged marriages are still a mystery :~) and they shall remain so !
yaar,what happened to the 4th part of ur story?
@Juhi : Ya i am….will i be able to solve the mystery or not….!! Million dollar question…but my question is who is giving me million dollars?
@Yemiledu : Yes true…..:) But they are definately better!!
@Chitz : I havnt started writing it yet….i will be coming with it soon….. thankz u so much !!
Read this some where…Marriage is that relation between man and woman in which the independence is equal, the dependence mutual, and the obligation reciprocal.
So guess, if these are there…love marriage or arranged marriage…both will work.
rohiiitttt…shaadi kar and then”go figure out” 🙂 🙂
@Shilpa mam : True … it works both ways.
@Sulagna mam : Yes i will do that soon …lolzzz 🙂
Rohit, can I give my extremely frank opinion on this topic? The people who have love marriages are restless, stubborn & impulsive. They sometimes marry against all odds. they also break up easily sometimes. But the people who agree to arranged marriages are a different lot. They are very traditional & somewhat ‘spineless’ when it comes to their love life, hence they let their parents choose for them (especially it today’s day & age!) hence they are not the types to take initiative for divorce, even if their marriages are unhappy. They are not assertive enough, & being traditional, they worry too much about what society would think. That is why arranged marriages are highly successful. Nothing much to do with happiness!
Anyway, cute blog you got here!
@Magali : Very genuine comment….I actually agree with you…. when you do love marriage “against” ur parents you not only break the heart of many loved ones but also disrespect their 20-25yrs of hard work !! truthful…….. 🙂
Arranged marriages ‘work’ because of societal pressures. Many women were afraid of leaving their husbands due to fear about what others would think, fear of ostracism as well as lack of financial independence. So I wouldn’t necessarily say that arranged marriages are successful. There are several arranged marriages out there where husbands are abusive towards their wives but the wives continue to stay on. And love marriages are not necessarily a failure or against the wishes of families…my uncle and aunt had a love marriage and next year will be celebrating their 20th anniversary. And it wasn’t done against the wishes of either family.
love marriages are also successful, but they have started probably we can say some10 years ago,
and arrange marriages are there from ages
so i think that it’s not right to compare the success rates of the two
it may also be possible that you didn’t come across the happy cases of love marriages
@Psych Babbler : Yes thats the point….i dont know why but in India there is still sometime to get the society approvals for love marriages….Congratulations to your uncle and aunty….may there love story remain alive forever!! 🙂
@Chetan : As we move towards westernization…i think in a matter of decade it will becomee very very common in India too!! I have come across many happy cases too!! U know the human mind….its filled with questions !!
I really dont know what is right and wrong.. Its like a coin that has equal probability to land on either face.. the only thing as rightly said here.. is the biasing one provides when goes with family and others.. but when you walk on ur own carved paths .. its tough plus you are the only one to take the righteous steps whenever u feel some bridging is required.. And that I blv makes all the difference..
Loku
@Loku : Nice…thinking….But while taking those steps it very imp to look around….so that you dont hurt anyone….